Fear cannot be got rid of – it is part and parcel of being human – it is biological and part of your nervous system. This is a remnant of our evolution – from the times of our ancestors dealing with tooth and nail violence – fear became something that helped us survive and prevail (win!).
So how can one reduce the effects or allow the fear to exist and operate effectively?
1. Awareness: Recognize the fear when it comes up.
Your body is a natural way to do this. Notice the bodily reactions e.g. a lump in the throat, tightened shoulders, frowns, breathing etc. Just account for what is happening as an observer with no judgment.
2. Awareness: Recognize the age of the fear.
For the most part, there is a portion of the fear which is real and in the moment – reflected in your bodily reactions. There is a second part that is more about the scars from previous traumas in your life. You could go back to your childhood (unless this is too traumatic). Notice what age this fear had it’s roots in. What happened then? Can you see that the scars were based on a reaction stemming from your age in that ordeal? Can you let go of that fear reaction now based on being an adult? (Letting go is different from eradicating – letting go is a willingness to let the fear have less of a hold on you.)
. Normalization: Acceptance and Embracing the Fear. Balancing the perspective on fear. Allow your mind to let go of the scars as in the above exercise.
. Putting more oxygen on the future (mission statement) versus your past. This will help distract from the fear.
. Creating structures and systems to fulfill on the future.
. Creating accountability till fulfillment of the future.
. Teaching others to do the same – this reinforces and refines your relationship to leadership and fear and takes the burden of leadership off your shoulders.
Success to you!
Executive Coach – Santa Cruz, San Jose, Capitola, CA